WEEK ELEVEN - CLOUDS PASSING THROUGH

It's amusing to me that I can go from "relaxed" to "driven" in the short span of a week. I was so delighted that I was seen to be "relaxed" by a guest at the Ashram last week.  In this case, I am admitting my own "self driven" state. 
I guess it is similar to clouds rolling in and out of the sky.  Luckily, here the beautiful blue sky returns quickly.

A couple of months ago, I read an article about Ayurveda as an antidote to unhealthy habits.  I believed that to be true before reading this article.

What's interesting is that the article focused on how we stand in the way of our own optimal health.  When I read it, I remember thinking that I agreed.  Yet, I felt that I was already actively working on my health, and so the article struck me as pertaining to others more than me.

This week, even being in the midst of a yearlong study of living an Ayurvedic-Yogic lifestyle in the gorgeous Bahamas, I find it to be true for me too.

I’ve mentioned before that I have a Pitta (Fire and Water) dominant constitution, and that I am working in large part on my Vata (Air) imbalances.  Pitta you may recall is the ruler of digestive fire, assimilation of information and also is a driver of action.  

My Vata imbalances relate to the airy and moving nature of Vata - dry skin, sleep issues, regulation of bodily elimination etc. I have Pitta and Kapha imbalances too, but Vata is the main focus for now.

This past week has been an especially busy one, with some major projects underway for the Communications Team, of which I am a part.  The work has been interesting and made the days fly by.  Yet, I found myself drifting back into old habits.

Maybe it is because it has been so many years of my being out of balance, but it surprises even me, that driving myself at a frenetic pace feels so natural and comfortable to me.  

I’m getting up at 5am and not really slowing down, unless I am in yoga class, which I missed twice this week, until 10:30 at night.  It’s true that my schedule at home in prior years was much worse, but I am in Paradise, and I have been learning a great deal about balance.

Implementation of what we learn and know is another matter altogether:)

The past two days, even my meals have been rushed.  My twice daily meditation this week was more filled with thoughts of my current work than experiencing the calmness I seek to feel.

Sure, I have learned to pull my thoughts back to focusing on the breath and my mantra, but I’ve noticed that I get carried away with thoughts of work much more than I remember to come back to my breath.  

Writing this update is being done at the last minute this week.  I find some of these self observations interesting, as I struggled to pull myself away from work long enough to share with all of you what the week has been like.  

If I look at what leads to the obvious Pitta imbalances surfacing quite intensely in me, I realize that I’ve missed yoga twice this week; I’ve not been daily making and drinking my prescriptive teas; I missed taking some of my prescriptive herbs; I've hurriedly eaten my meals, barely tasting the food; and I haven’t even supported my own peace of mind by getting laundry done in a timely fashion, so I can have clean clothes and sheets.  It's no wonder that my imbalances have steadily increased.

None of this was done on purpose by any means. Mostly, it all just crept up on me unknowingly.  

This morning I did not have one clean top to wear that wasn’t long sleeved, and it is 90 degrees here.  Laundry became a must do, instead of a weekly task - going way past a week, as I’ve done, with limited clothing and 90 degree heat, is not a smart move on my part.  It's been a daily stress, as I've known that it had to be done but kept putting it off.

Somehow, the past few days I’ve found that suddenly, it is the end of the day, and I’m completely unaware of how the time could have flown by so quickly.  I sit down and start working and it seems as though minutes, instead of hours have passed.

What I realized just now, while writing this update, is that I’m working on balance in a very unbalanced way this week:)
Amazing how quickly I can move backwards in my progress .  The good news is that I am able to notice it , not beat myself up about it and recalibrate.  

As soon as I have some clean clothes and clean sheets, I will make some changes to get back on a more balanced track.

Good luck with whatever imbalances you are facing.  Every day we have a chance to start anew!

Sending you love from the Bahamas,

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