Many people have asked how I feel as the time is so close to my leap into a year of living an Ayurvedic-Yogic lifestyle.
I can best describe these past couple of months with another somewhat similar experience.
I’ve been feeling just like I did when I decided one day at a pool that I was going off the high dive for the first time. I started out with determination and excitement as I walked to the diving board with all the other “big kids”.
I stood in line a little nervous but feeling good. As I climbed the ladder, the bottom section was really easy and I glided over the steps. The higher I got, my pace slowed a bit and I had to breathe deeply to fortify my nerve. And I kept going to the top.
Once on the board, both elation, excitement and a “Whoa this is really high” set in. Right now, with less than a week before I leave to move out of the country for a year, I am feeling fully the enormity of this adventure and lifestyle change. It really is a HUGE LEAP for me!
From the 5:30am rise each morning, to living in a simple accommodation with shared shower and toilet facilities, to the Ayurvedic and vegetarian foods, to the 'no tv', 'no alcohol', 'no takeout or late night food deliveries', to morning and evening silent meditation and lights out at 10:30 for the whole Ashram - definitely some big changes from my Chicago, city living lifestyle.
Yet, when I looked back at the long way down the ladder and the others waiting for me to jump, I knew I wouldn't go backwards. When I looked in front of me at the end of the board and realized the board seems even higher on the top than it did from the ground, it gave me pause but I still kept moving forward.
When I was a little girl, I jumped off with my eyes closed and screamed the whole way to the water! After I bobbed back up to the water's surface, I couldn't wait to get in line and go again:)
With my heart beating a bit faster these days, and the flow of boxing for storage and packing to move out of the country in full swing - I FEEL SO ALIVE!
It’s a GREAT FEELING, and I have sat in meditation that has affirmed I am meant to do this and am on a wonderful path for myself - and maybe I can help one or ten or even thousands of others who are interested to learn about Ayurveda and What is Possible? living a different lifestyle that focuses on a balanced mind, body and spirit.
I am ready and nervous AND THAT”S OK and Great!
I am confident of my guide, the highly esteemed KP Khalsa. I will be taking herbs from the well respected and best organic provider of herbs in the U.S., Banyan Botanicals. And last, but certainly not least, I will be immersed in the beautiful and spiritually rich Ayurvedic life that is lived at the Sivananda Yoga Retreat and Ashram in the Bahamas.
I am grateful, blessed, excited and nervous as I inch my way forward to Friday, when I take the final leap.
I won't have my eyes closed, and I will have my heart and mind open:)
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